Calming our Defensive Reflexes
Emma was on edge, taking in the world around her with more than caution. Her eyes were darting, fearful and overwhelmed by everything around her. Noises were too much and she felt everything deeply.
From 11 months of age, Emma had been shuttled between therapists and appointments. Her weeks were packed with up to ten therapy sessions, many of them a long car ride from home. Still, no one could explain fearful behavior, her tension. Emma’s parents struggled with naps, which were a routine battle for their overstimulated daughter. Her body simply would not relax.
Emma had support in the classroom, but conferences were met with concern. Every morning, she cried at drop off and counted the hours until she returned to her mom. At school, Emma was constantly revved up, prone to outbursts and overstimulation. She required frequent sensory breaks. Then, Emma found Thrive. Her mom was introduced to an acquaintance who suggested she might have delayed primitive reflexes. She was referred to a specialist nearby: Elizabeth Hickman.
“We had literally hundreds of appointments and no one was able to give me anywhere near the comfort and the understanding that Elizabeth has,” says Emma’s mom of discovering Thrive two years ago. “She was the first person to make sense of all of her history. It all started coming together.”
Elizabeth worked with Emma on calming her system and shaped her once weekly sessions around addressing her active defensive reflexes. Emma’s parents practiced rhythmic movement exercises at home, building on her weekly sessions and lessons they learned after attending a Thrive workshop. Slowly but surely, Emma found calm. Her mother watched in amazement as her child’s alert system was able to relax. To see their daughter, comforted to the point of dozing off after a Thrive session was a welcome new milestone.
Last fall, Emma’s mom sat in on a very different parent-teacher conference. Over and over again, her teachers echoed their amazement for this gifted child. She’s doing phenomenally, they said. She asks questions and waits patiently for help. Her problem solving is grade levels ahead. She is comfortable in her own skin.
When a child experiences overstimulation, prone to outbursts and has trouble self-soothing, both fear paralysis and Moro are active. Driven by the over-production of adrenaline, they are literally stuck in ‘fight or flight’ mode, as the body has not yet learned to reset to a place of calm and a feeling of safety.
